One Heart With Two Sides

This heart of mine is a conflicted indeed

On one hand its filled with love and joy,

On the other its contains misery an pain

Just as every coin has two sides, so do I

One side feels love, happiness, a feeling that

Causes my heart to want rejoice from the joy.

The other side feels lonely, incomplete, feelings

Wanting to overtake everything else I feel inside

Is there something wrong with my own heart,

Or is it merely destiny that makes me feel this

Am I destined to always face this ongoing fight,

One that could possibly last until the my end?

Is there a cure in sight for this heart of mine

Someone, something, anything  that could find,

A way to take away the dark side of my heart,

Or will I lose the fight within my own heart?

Life, Blessing or Curse?

Life itself is sometimes considered in two ways
One of which is a blessing that brings happiness
The second is a curse that brings eternal misery,
Begs the question, is it just unavoidable or fate?

Different mentalitys determine who we become,
also what course of actions we choose to take
when certain situations presents themselves,
Do you hesistate or do you go all in, do or die?

Happiness comes to those people who simplify,
not holding onto possesions in this cursed world
but can that really bring u happiness in a world
when the name of the game is Winner Takes All?

Misery tho seems to follow those ones in distress,
Those who fight to just barley survive this world,
Have they done anything wrong to deserve this?
Not neccessarily, but does that change anything?
Life does know how to take away the life of good ones
yet decent to the ones who dont deserve there own life,
Sickness claims the lifes of those we love, embedding
pain that always seems to just keep adding up on us

Is there a possible way to live here in this world happily?
or do we simply just cry it out an move along each day?
Which brings up this question to all of us in this world,
Are any of us ever Ok or simply well enough to get by?

Dreaming Of Nightmares

As i dream of you, i begin to miss you dearly

though you may be gone now from this life,

i still dream about being around you again,

Asking questions getting back some answers

So how can one talk to the ones passed on?

Is there a link that we share that allows us to?

or has my insanity gotten the best of me now?

I miss you so much my dear sis, am i wrong to?

I talk for what seems like hours, listening as well

Hearing this an that, its like you has never left

an yet,  just like that my dream begins to turn

switching from happiness to a very dark place

The once happy dream, stained with your blood

quickly becoming a nightmare, watching you 

complete the deed to free yourself, one im stuck

forced to watch, trying to scream, unable to stop it

I see before me images that i wish to be gone 

thoughts i wish to be ripped from my own head

unable to not blame myself for losing you then

waking up in tears, wanting to scream out loud

How can something start so great, end so foul?

What causes the dreams of ones we hold dear

turning into unforgiving nightmares, tormenting 

the fragile heart that we try so hard to protect?

The pain is like a disease that has no healing cure

A pain in which there is no way to forgive yourself.

My soul will always be tormented from that day,

I pray that your soul rest in peace, my dear sister

The Ties That Bind

Wishes can be like the sun to morning,
sealing the darkness once more again.
Or they can be like the dark starry skies,
swallowing the world in eternal darkness

Wishes are the tying bond between
this world an the dreams of everyone
the world we now have before us is
anything but a dream but a nightmare

Why is that?, isnt the world meant for
the dreams of those to come alive,
to flourish an grow into better things?
or was that simply wishful thinking?

Wishes are ideas that hold the ability
to either destory or power thoughts,
ones which in turn can benefit life now
or add hope for what the future brings

One must always be careful in wishing,
You might obtain it an more then can
be handled, easily overwhelming you,
so ask yourself, is it honestly worth it?

Wandering Soul

The wandering soul is a thinker indeed
looking around, exploring all options,
before ever making a single move,
but does that make him always right?

 If so then the road taken, painful as it is
will eventually with have a happy ending
or is that true? or was it a foolish decision 
that will only end in a pain stricken heart?

 On the other hand, the road not taken? A choice
has been made,  but does that make you wrong?
Or do you simply stick to the path youve chosen
even if you begin to wonder, am i right or wrong?

 But at what cost? Having to stay on your path
could cost you a chance at eternal happiness,
or at the painful expense of loved one's heart,
how far will you go to know the answer now?

 Will you wait to see if your choice succeeds later
or will you shift in your ways to not have to wait?
We all must ask ourselves, is ending the pain now 
worth it or suffer through to hope the pain fades

 The end of the road holds the key to the question
so many of us wonder, am i doing whats right?
or am i burying myself deeper into my grave?
Only time will tell if i made the right choice

Labyrinth Of Life

O the choices in this life
each effecting you in many
different ways, good or bad
reminds you of a labyrinth

Walking this way or that way
ultimatly determines your fate
coming to a fork in the road
which way is right or is there one?

Staring down the crossroad at hand
which one to take an which to leave?
taking one way might lead you to life
the other could easily be your death

Each of our lifes is like this labyrinth
every choice could make or break you
an the after affects could effect others
ones that you may or may not care about

Moving through the labyrinth of life
is really not one of ease by any means
taking your time to seek out all options
in turn will affect what path you move on

So the last question that still remains is
which path shall you follow in this life,
those who have come before your time
or will you make your own to survive?

Being With You

Being with you is incredible

your love is felt with every kiss

a feeling i miss so much now

while i await to see u again

When im with you, im free

not held back by anything

free to express myself to you

even if its just my heartbeat

Your Kindness is that of angels

the happiness i recieve from you

is a very special gift to me indeed

one that i wish to hold onto forever

When u came into my own life

I was hurt an in pain an yet

you helped me push through it

an made me stand again now

You gave me reason to change,

a reason to redefine what it truly

is to live life an love another one

something ill never let myself forget

You are the one i wish to hold

until the end of times an cherish

like no other has ever for you.

You, my love are a gift from the gods

Words cannot truly explain my feelings

but i know in your heart you understand

as u lay next to me listening to my heart

as it beats for you an for you alone now.

Night Rain

Tiny Dropplets of water

Falling high from the sky

somewhere i want to be

yet im stuck on this earth

Sitting out in the cold rain

is the only way of crying

an yet no one knowing it

even as blood runs off me

The tears being shed now

are that of true intense pain

one that even the night rain

might not be able to fix now

The yearning to be taken away

like rain moving over the plains,

not having to stay where one

doesnt wish to ever be any more

Feeling the rain upon my skin

as it slowly begins to soothe me.

i wish for it all to be a nightmare,

one which is gone when i awake

As the pain fades from the rain

all i can do now is move from here,

stronger an pray that all goes well

or am i merely dreaming again?

Being Without You

Why must i be in this place

a place in which i grow tired,

a place that only drains the soul,

a place that makes me feel alone.

When im forced to be by myself

i can only dream of being with you

lost within myself as i think of you,

pain growing more painful each day

The love we share, the happiness

is something so hard to be without.

My only ambitions are to be with u

so what am i do when thats all i want?

Waiting day by day, hour by hour

letting time go by just to be with u,

trying to fill the time an keep out

the pain that burns within so deep

The dark nights an rains that follow

are the only comforts to me now as

i wait to hold u in my arms once again

this is my wish as i stare into starry skys

Perilous Journey

As we move through this life

we all must ask ourselves this,

What is our purpose in this life?

Are we to live by truth or by lies?

Some would tell u honesty is the key

others would say not knowing is right

so which is it? is it safe to say that not

knowing or knowing makes the difference?

This curse, one which in turn can either

make one stand up unfaulted or destory

the very life they hold so dear to them.

Quite the pickel isnt it? so which is right?

Truth is said to be the only way to life

because it keeps everyones trust now

but yet the truth also can tear those

who we care about far away from us

Living a lie is viewed as being a traitor

because people end up hurt in the matter

but yet sometimes the less they know,

the better off some seem to be, so what to do?

One must ask is there a balance between them?

or is it simply one must choose which way to go?

Comparing truth an lies are like comparing a coin

both sides while different, exist as one object

How u determine the situation of life determines

your state of mind of which way u will go on.

Is there a right an wrong or do we merely forget

that just like the coin, both sides reside in this life

As we move this perilous journey in this life,

the choices we make ultimately will affect

our lifes as well as those around us so with

that power of choice, which life will we live by?

End Of It

What do u do when someone,

u cared so deeply for, hurts u?

do u sit there an scream intensely

or do u seek revenge to end it all?

You have released the demon from within

u have crossed the line for the final time

its time i took revenge, taking u down

but how does someone go about this?

Does one simply kill u like a criminal?

or think it out like a serial killer does ?

hmm no no no those wont do at all

all thats left is your pathetic mind

Oh the ways to toy with your mind

how blind u are to my dark ways

but how to proceed? hmm a choice,

to let u live or suffer is that choice

But then the question comes to mind

am i really any better then u for seeking

what seems to be revenge on my part?

or better for seeking justice to my heart?

So now the choice is mine again, to hurt or let go

The demon inside wishes to unleash its rage

The angel wishes for it to be released like,

letting out a breathe of air, letting it dissipate

Who of us knows the answer to this question

while we lay awake at night completing

was i wrong? or was i justified in my actions?

this i ask myself laying here gazing into the stars

Stormy Night

Tears falling just like rain

is like watching part of u,

bleeding out to the floor

never seeming to run out

This pain i feel comes as fast

as it seems to slowly fade away

feeling your pain as if it were as

me being in your shoes this time

Never being able to escape this,

no matter how hard i may try

trying to shelter myself from it

yet still feeling the cold essence

So why is this pain so damaging

the pain strikes like lightning.

so unforgiving now that i cant cut

loose from all the sadness it brings

If u could listen to my heartbeat now

ud hear the roar just like thunder

it begs to spring forth an engulf me

yet it slowly fades away into nothing

Yet as the storm passes, the tears

slowly start to stop, drying my eyes

i start slowly getting back to myself

easing back again until the next one

Bleeding Heart

Bleeding is something we all do

some more then all the rest of us

but we dont mean literal bleeding

no this bleeding is much much worse

the bleeding heart is one most painful

no relief in sight for those who have it

an lack of understanding for those

who do not posess this pain so great

the pain of losing someone is so great

u bleed from the inside out an cry,

scream even curse gods name to the dust

but does it help? is there a cure for this ?

Only time is the healer of wounds they say

but is that truly the answer? to sit an wait?

as you feel part of u start to die as the pain

only worsens slowly eating away at you

I laugh at those who believe time is the answer

the answer is so simple but its also very painful

i speak of which is acceptance, the act of accepting

what has happened an move on with your life

Easier said then done isnt it, an yet think,

its the only answer there really is in this life

when u think about those who are gone

what would they think if they saw u give up?

Ask yourself this then think, if im truly to be happy

an show that they arent forgotten, u get back up

an strive harder an prove that just because there not

on this earth, that there not with not with u in spirit

So if u wish to sew up the broken heart within u,

let there spirit be there to guide u as each step

u slowly take an eventually u will come to stand up,

strong once again an hold yourself up once more